Friday, June 19, 2009

Shake shake shake

Hey porns and prawns, I am back :) anyone miss me?

It has been eons since I last type anything here and I hope the spiders and lizards are not disturbed today.

Just want to share a few rants with you guys. June and July is a month full of action packed movies but I felt they left out comedies. But it is "OK" to me and the rest of 24 millions Malaysians because everyday in Malaysia is a comedy :)

From political scene to the very word of our beloved ministries will sure tickle even the heart made of steel.

Forget the jokes from our country rep and now I would like to bring your attention to myself. Recently I met with an accident that cost me RM2000 (US$ 600). My car spin and end up knocking a Proton Satria.



Introducing my limited edition Proton Tapir 1.3GL

Proton Tapir 1.3GL specs

150 TP (tapir power = 1/2 horse power)
1299 CC
14" plastic sports rim
Faulty auto window
Cassette audio system
Bean Curd body structure
No air bag
No ABS
Fuel drinking machine
Bumpphylic (Will touch the road bumps whether you like it or not)
Smelly and dirty
Vroom vroom

Whoever interested to purchase this car from me feel free to drop me a message, COD prefer but I can mail it to you if possible.

As what our beloved Mr Semi Value commented on our pride national courier service "Esok Hantar Hari Ini Sampai" which literally means Tomorrow you mail, today you receieve.


Anyway, the month of May isn't really good for me, not only My Tapir powercar crashed, but it also break down in Simpang Renggam (on the way to Johor Bahru from KL) and the car the mechanic borrow me (Proton Iswara Aeroback 1.3) run out of fuel (on the way from Johor Bahru back to Simpang Renggam). And the repair cost me RM800 (US$250).

Luckily my body is still in one piece.

Recently I am very dissapointed on the over censored film the Malaysian Censoreship Board introduced. For example, a simple kissing scene were completely censored. I don't fcuking know what is all this joke about. Common it is just a kiss. Do you think by censoring such scene, children or anyone will never know what it looks like? I think such Censoreship Board are vestigial and unnecessary. They should abolished the board because it is wasting public funds.

Let any movie come in. I am sure people will be sane enough to differenciate between film and reality. If they can't, then why bother such people because they are no different from rubbish.

The same goes to gory scene. Why on earth you want to censore such scene? Isn't it part or element of a film that make it good. If you want to censore every single gory feature, do censore Barney's sharp teeth.


Barney and wounded friend


Really wasting money to watch good films in cinema because of such censored stuffs. Imagine I pay not to watch. And yet they campaign anti-piracy to stop pirated disc.

I really don't care about concerned parents over their stupid mentality begging authority to censored every single media. Such parents are no doubt stupid. If you don't want your bejewelled kids to watch gory, x-rated scene, then keep them inside a bird cage and force them to watch Teletubbies. If you want to keep your children out of the real world, then slaughter them so they can be in heaven and sing everyday.

If you refer to the kids in USA who shoot and berserk in school because of the influence of movies and violent games, I can tell you this is all tapirshit. I watch violent film and play violent game. I even slaughter mice and cockroaches before. But did I went around my school and shoot or butcher people? NO

Why? Because I am a human with human brain and those who shoot is a human with tapir brain. Not because they watch or play violent material, they will become a killer. They become killer or criminals is because of who are they. Such parents who blame every single thing beside them for their bad children upbringing are morons.

To discipline your kids, it not only depend on yourself. It also depend on them. If they want to kill, they kill. I did not blame the media because I got belly tummy. I blame Malaysian good food instead but can I apply to ban all delicious food before 100% Malaysian become obese?

And not only they censore gory or erotic scene, they also censore vulgar words. Issit dumb to watch a movie and listen to the conversation and suddenly "silence" when one of the actor/actresses utter some vulgar words?

So what if you censore all these, people still use them. This only means censoreship fails and more drastic actions are needed. Fail = fail. No excuses.

If you want to ban vulgarity and create and ideal environment, kill everyone and yourself on earth. Just like pressing the reset button and hope the new dominant species on earth will be ideal.

I can tell you the earth is beautiful because of vulgarity, gory and exotic adventures. Not because of harmony birds chipping and Mary Poppins flying here and there singing.



Look at how happy can 3 creepy creatures with a beautiful princess can live together. See, deadly octopus, flesh loving croc and fat Me can still live happily with this delicious human. So the conclusion is, I am poor and I need more money.

Anyway, do you guys know that an apple a day does not really keeps the doctor away. To keep the doctor away, all you do is just to evade the doctor, don't go to hospitals or clinics, don't befriend any doctors, cage yourself and etc etc.

Should not misguide children because of this stupid phrase. Its time for people to overhaul English !!!!


- d a r t h i k e a -


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