Robert's Char Kuey Teow

Yesterday was Thaipussam. So me and my beloved "bara bara" one decided to try out Petaling Jaya's pride and joy in terms of food. After much googling from her, it is known that a Char Koay Teow (Fried Noodles with COCKles, prawn & eggs) located in PJ should not be missed.

A few "good" taste butt bloggers fully swore to heaven that Robert's Char Koay Teow (CKT) is the chosen one. So being a patriotic CKTians, it has been a long suffering for not knowing there is such a God send noodles in PJ and with the Holiday awarded by the world no. 1 government, I will only be more stupid if I do not shift myself to Robert's CKT to try it out.

After much search & research for its address, I key in the location into my trusted GPS and immediately teleported ourselves there. Are you guys anxious to know the address for this place?

A hint: It is a stall located in a shop. It has some branches but the main one is located in SS17, PJ.

I do not wish to tell you guys the location because I totally do not recommend anyone that still breath to try this CKT. It was one of the lousiest CKT in the universe and it taste hideous. Let me tell you how it is being presented.

For the presentation of the food:

It doesn't look good, it doesn't smell anything and it swallow me RM4 each. According to some genius blogger out there who recommended me this monstrosity, the prawn is so big that you will choke if you don't cut the prawn into 4 pieces before eating. The noodle taste like your biting a lorry tyre. The COCKles given to me are so small that they instantly evaporated once reached my table. The prawns are a little bit bigger than the invisible COCKles but not as big as described. The size of it is only as big as a nipple tip. The eggs fried together with the noodles look like a tissue paper after soaking into dog's urine.

For the taste, it taste like as though you are licking a salt cave. Some blogspot geniuses even claim that the taste is even better than sex. I totally disagree as this CKT is only good if all the food ration in this world is being destroyed and you have no choice but to endure this CKT.

Ok, I was told by my bee that when doing a food review, we should include the service and its atmosphere too. For its service, I do no expect him to dance while we eat and he did what he should do. Cook, serve and destroy our taste bud. So no complain about that.

For the atmosphere, since it is located in a shop, I think it is not fair to judge him and blame all to him. But if would like to talk about the atmosphere of his stall, it look like a haunted den.

For rating, I would personally rate this shop as non existence. No rate is given because after this post, this stall will be totally erased from my memory.

Thanks for enjoying my 1st food review. More to come if and only if I was being motivated. Hope you like my fair review as I was not getting any paid from any CKT stall to sabotage Mr Robert.

My Verdict & Summary:

Pros: Good was to play a prank on yourself eating this for the preparation to join Fear Factor

Cons: .It is a poison

P/s: This plate of arsenic really spoils me and my bee's entire day. Hoping for something edible and being served with this is totally unforgivable.

- d a r t h i k e a -

Please save me !!!!

WTF.....I think anyone can be singer nowadays.

Enjoy please. Turned up your volume and watch those earthlings shake their head.




- d a r t h i k e a -

My 25th Birthday (23rd April 2010)

Hey guys,

I just celebrated my 25th miserable birthday in Johore. Why miserable? well mainly because what I initially planned was being scrapped but luckily my colleague Cheah treat me a great dinner there. But still there was someone missing :(

My small little ciku bee even gave me two surprises. One being sneakily placed in my luggage while she help me pack because I wasn't feeling well that day due to some bloody indigestion/gastric problem I have been suffering since I learn how our genitals work.

Before I move forward, here is some info for those who have no idea what CIKU is.

"Ciku (Manilkara sp.), a tropical fruit also known as sapodilla, belongs to the family Sapotaceae. Various species of Manilkara are grown and used worldwide for different purposes. The species most popular for its fruit in Singapore and Southeast Asia is the Manilkara zapota. This was also called Manilkara achras, Achras zapota or Nispero achras, a derivative of the Greek word achras for the Pear tree, because of the fruit's semblance to a pear." - quoted by some miserable websites.

Put those boring explanation aside. Let me tell you what Ciku is.

1st, it looks like this (looks more handsome then overrated Oceanic KIWI):



2nd, it tastes like this (in a sweet sugary way):



But why I call her my cute little ciku?

Its because she is cute, she is little (in size) and I love to eat CIKU.

Anyway, this is what she sneaked into my luggage as my "appetizer" present. Love the surprises even thou she hinted to me the umpteenth times that there-is-something-inside-my-bag-and-I-need-to-unpack-my-clothes-to-know-where-it-is.



This is a key chain of an Assault Rifle called the Bullpup which attracted my attention when we went Genting Highlands. She is sneaky enough to buy without my knowledge :(

But the main meal is my current favorite perfume the Polo Black :P :P this time comes with deodorant. (bee, I'm gonna find out how much it cost no matter what)


Absolutely fantastic :) Thanks ciku bee.

But guys, been having stress lately with money. And now I have been waking up looking differently each day due to stresses especially when I KNOW I DID NOT GET MY INCENTIVES/BONUS AS PROMISED !!!!! Hope you guys still remember me when bump into me anywhere.

MONDAY (I think she likes me this way. She is smiling all the way)


TUESDAY (Trying to act stress just to match me)


WEDNESDAY (She will only kiss me when I show her my Wednesday face)


THURSDAY (She hate me on Thursday)


FRIDAY (I think I look like KFC on Friday)


SATURDAY (Her dream man on Saturday)


SUNDAY (Left me alone with all the presents she bought for me)


Since I am so pitied, and pity people with many pity story is found on newspaper asking for donation. Me too, wanna ask all my buddy here for donation to repair my face and buy a new car ! :P


Your money is my presents for my 25th Birthday for those who have not given me anything yet :P

- d a r t h i k e a -


p/s : Anyway, just wanna let you guys know that motorcyclist annoyed me to the max. Their presence boil my blood and their existence makes my tummy acid's flood.

Same goes to most taxis' drivers. They think their father got 14 nuts and their mothers got gigantic fire boobs so they can just break anytime anywhere. And some can even drive so slow hoping to get some last minute customer that they can drive at a pace I think I can be faster than them if I can walk with my butt.

Lastly are those road hogger. They can drive without pressing the gas pedal leaving behind all movement by their clutches on a single lane road thinking that he is the only one left on earth battling the undead.

Yes, true enough drive slowly is a courtesy and doesn't endangered others but because of your action, people who are forced to follow you will also be shorten about 10 years of lifespan. The bloody Ministers should not encourage people to drive slow but at least drive with a brain.

Speaking bout brain, I am so happy knowing that those authorities have finally found their brain and widen the miserably narrow lane leading to my ciku bee's house.

But yet those roads are plagued with road bumps. I wonder why on earth you need to have 4-5 road bumps in a short stretched of road. Perhaps the government got shares with some car absorbers' companies. How on earth can they think of rooting so many bumps in a small stretch of road. One day if my butt's shape transform into some horribly shape, I am gonna take legal action against those bonkers. Gonna sue them for bumping my butt out of alignment.

Took them 50+ plus years to evolve from a bean to a bigger beans, I wonder how long should we wait for them to become a complete plant.

Our 2nd Anniversary together :)

Jeanette, I love the way you care,
Even before I caught your heart,
All I ever wanted is to be there,
Never care even we are far apart,
Every moment we spend together,
The feelings for you grew stronger and stronger,
Then you gave me the kiss at last,
Ended my sorrow and our love life starts.

When you go to sleep I hope you dream of me,
Only you my dear I would like to see,
On a night like this just you and me.

My lovely little sweetheart,
Unbelievably cute and smart,
Now we are together, as sweet as a sugartart.

My heart begins to dance, I know the feelings are real,
Under your careful arms, love is all I feel,
No one can replace you my dear, we are meant to be together.


- d a r t h i k e a -

Dugong Bee

Not many people who have a girlfriend that knows how to massage, how to sooth their boyfriend when they are at stress and also to give their boyfriend a smile that could made up the day. Not many girlfriend who loves teddy bear and puppies but could love crocs and lizards plus squids and other cute slimy creatures with you :)

Not many girlfriend that can breath vigorously through her nose when you touch it just to make sure the nose does function. Not many girlfriend that will wear a pokka love shirt just to make you smile. Not many girlfriend that feels happy when their boyfriend give them a daily visit :)

But my girlfriend is and I am proud and lucky to have her by my side all this while.

Although there was some misunderstanding between us but I am very very happy we sought it out and make it up back with each other. I believe our adventure will go on further. Can't wait to enjoy my life with her and food hunting in Ipoh this coming Saturday :)

Besides that I will also take my Proton Tapir and turn it back into the white horse that I once owned.


See, couple like this shouldn't be separated just like that. Couple like this should seed more offspring and dominate the earth Muahahahahaha


- d a r t h i k e a -

Shake shake shake

Hey porns and prawns, I am back :) anyone miss me?

It has been eons since I last type anything here and I hope the spiders and lizards are not disturbed today.

Just want to share a few rants with you guys. June and July is a month full of action packed movies but I felt they left out comedies. But it is "OK" to me and the rest of 24 millions Malaysians because everyday in Malaysia is a comedy :)

From political scene to the very word of our beloved ministries will sure tickle even the heart made of steel.

Forget the jokes from our country rep and now I would like to bring your attention to myself. Recently I met with an accident that cost me RM2000 (US$ 600). My car spin and end up knocking a Proton Satria.



Introducing my limited edition Proton Tapir 1.3GL

Proton Tapir 1.3GL specs

150 TP (tapir power = 1/2 horse power)
1299 CC
14" plastic sports rim
Faulty auto window
Cassette audio system
Bean Curd body structure
No air bag
No ABS
Fuel drinking machine
Bumpphylic (Will touch the road bumps whether you like it or not)
Smelly and dirty
Vroom vroom

Whoever interested to purchase this car from me feel free to drop me a message, COD prefer but I can mail it to you if possible.

As what our beloved Mr Semi Value commented on our pride national courier service "Esok Hantar Hari Ini Sampai" which literally means Tomorrow you mail, today you receieve.


Anyway, the month of May isn't really good for me, not only My Tapir powercar crashed, but it also break down in Simpang Renggam (on the way to Johor Bahru from KL) and the car the mechanic borrow me (Proton Iswara Aeroback 1.3) run out of fuel (on the way from Johor Bahru back to Simpang Renggam). And the repair cost me RM800 (US$250).

Luckily my body is still in one piece.

Recently I am very dissapointed on the over censored film the Malaysian Censoreship Board introduced. For example, a simple kissing scene were completely censored. I don't fcuking know what is all this joke about. Common it is just a kiss. Do you think by censoring such scene, children or anyone will never know what it looks like? I think such Censoreship Board are vestigial and unnecessary. They should abolished the board because it is wasting public funds.

Let any movie come in. I am sure people will be sane enough to differenciate between film and reality. If they can't, then why bother such people because they are no different from rubbish.

The same goes to gory scene. Why on earth you want to censore such scene? Isn't it part or element of a film that make it good. If you want to censore every single gory feature, do censore Barney's sharp teeth.


Barney and wounded friend


Really wasting money to watch good films in cinema because of such censored stuffs. Imagine I pay not to watch. And yet they campaign anti-piracy to stop pirated disc.

I really don't care about concerned parents over their stupid mentality begging authority to censored every single media. Such parents are no doubt stupid. If you don't want your bejewelled kids to watch gory, x-rated scene, then keep them inside a bird cage and force them to watch Teletubbies. If you want to keep your children out of the real world, then slaughter them so they can be in heaven and sing everyday.

If you refer to the kids in USA who shoot and berserk in school because of the influence of movies and violent games, I can tell you this is all tapirshit. I watch violent film and play violent game. I even slaughter mice and cockroaches before. But did I went around my school and shoot or butcher people? NO

Why? Because I am a human with human brain and those who shoot is a human with tapir brain. Not because they watch or play violent material, they will become a killer. They become killer or criminals is because of who are they. Such parents who blame every single thing beside them for their bad children upbringing are morons.

To discipline your kids, it not only depend on yourself. It also depend on them. If they want to kill, they kill. I did not blame the media because I got belly tummy. I blame Malaysian good food instead but can I apply to ban all delicious food before 100% Malaysian become obese?

And not only they censore gory or erotic scene, they also censore vulgar words. Issit dumb to watch a movie and listen to the conversation and suddenly "silence" when one of the actor/actresses utter some vulgar words?

So what if you censore all these, people still use them. This only means censoreship fails and more drastic actions are needed. Fail = fail. No excuses.

If you want to ban vulgarity and create and ideal environment, kill everyone and yourself on earth. Just like pressing the reset button and hope the new dominant species on earth will be ideal.

I can tell you the earth is beautiful because of vulgarity, gory and exotic adventures. Not because of harmony birds chipping and Mary Poppins flying here and there singing.



Look at how happy can 3 creepy creatures with a beautiful princess can live together. See, deadly octopus, flesh loving croc and fat Me can still live happily with this delicious human. So the conclusion is, I am poor and I need more money.

Anyway, do you guys know that an apple a day does not really keeps the doctor away. To keep the doctor away, all you do is just to evade the doctor, don't go to hospitals or clinics, don't befriend any doctors, cage yourself and etc etc.

Should not misguide children because of this stupid phrase. Its time for people to overhaul English !!!!


- d a r t h i k e a -

A day with my honey bee in Ipoh

As you can see in my Bee's blog post, we spend a day, or I can say almost a day in Ipoh and another part of it in Sg. Siput, my bee's mum's hometown.

Another 1/5 of the day was also meeting Alex where he force me once again to fetch me for lunch for a meet up in Ipoh Old town. But this time that bugger a bit behave because for the 1st time since the battle of Parameswara, that bugger finally take out his wallet and buy me and my bee a drink plus a few cucuk of sate.

Lucky he did that if not sure kick him out of the car. LOL

Was spending some time in Jusco before that to satisfy my bee's physiological need of consuming sushi everytime we met hehe

Some kinda weird disease she contracted dunno since when, but I do admit, me myself is a great fan of sushi too especially in Shogun whacking 7-8 fresh oysters in a row without getting my stomach upset.

You guys must be wondering, or maybe don't bother at all, why I don't blog or seldom blog nowadays but suddenly today so damn good go and waste some google space to blog?

Ok, let me tell you this

I FINALLY GOT BERUK BAND, BY MAXIS AFTER 5 YEARS OF WAITING. MUAHAHAHAHA I PAWNED YOU

Inside my bee's aunt house, I was being left by her immediately because she was busy getting her leg massaged while I am interogated by her Sherlock grandma :) but luckily its nothing more than a casual chat which I am more comfortable with.

Maybe the scenario of parents/grandparents interogating is not really as scary as I used to think where I expect them to test me, just like the movie "Meet the parents" but it turn out to be "Meet the Fockers" instead where I really have a warm and fun time being there besides watching my bee growning in agony/joy of getting her sexy feet being squeezed like how the "ghost" squeeze my balls in my previous post.

Then, I took my bee to my own home back in Ipoh for me to bath and get ready to attend some unknown relative of hers wedding dinner. Upon arriving, my bee was being greeted by my horny dogs. Keep smelling her feet. Really feel like boiling those dogs for doing such HARAM stuffs in front of me. HMPH

After I bath, I straight drove to MENGLEMBU. My bee can't help but to laugh at the place name. Don't really know what is going on in her mind but when I was young, I always thought that place got one lembu or cow we call it in English called MENG or maybe belong to MENG.

Anyway, despite my good road recognition, I managed only 3 fail attempt to locate the restaurant called Rainbow Seafood Restaurant. GENG LEH !!!!! So pro.

Ate some nice stuffs there. Really enjoy that big fat juicy prawn. But most importantly, I am with my bee and she was an angel that night in a beautiful dress.

*just to add this to evade future damage to my body*

She look great everyday too :)

Here are some of the pictures I feel deserve a post here and was not posted in my bee's blog :)

Do envy


Me and bee, my hand behaving :)


See now who is taller? :P


A sugar modelled which caught many of my bee's cousin and my bee's eye. Prefer it to be some kinda eel or lizard instead.


Me playing "stick our face" with bee


Bee and me in the wedding before the food arrive, look at our hungry face


Me being blocked by my bee


Me and bee after we swap place cause bee wanna sit big big space wo.


Me and bee before we swapped place, where I can sit in a big big place.


Bee with her sis, dad and mum. Her sis taller than her haha


Bee with her beautiful smile. Notice the pendant? I bought for her ga !!!


Bee and her mischievious smile :)


Bee camwhore in my mum's car.


Bee wanna show the daki in her hand.


Me practising how to carry shopping bags for bee in the wedding dinner.


Bee, kueh teow and raw si ham.


Bee locking my arm :)


- d a r t h i k e a -